You’re Not Broken—You’re Just Tired

I recently fed nearly a decade of performance reviews, feedback logs, and growth check-ins into ChatGPT to help me make sense of my career.

I was burned out. After years of navigating pandemic uncertainty, remote work, shifting team dynamics, changing responsibilities, and family challenges at home—I felt like I’d lost sight of my trajectory. I’ve always pushed for clarity in my work, but when it came to my own journey, I couldn’t see the shape of it anymore.

So I turned to AI. Not for answers—but for reflection.

I compiled it all: every annual review since 2017, every mid-year check-in, every piece of peer or manager feedback I could find. Some of it was structured. Some was scattered. But once it was all together, patterns started to emerge.

💪 A Portrait of Strength (Whether I Saw It or Not)

Over and over, the feedback painted a picture I wasn’t always able to see for myself in the moment:

“Everyone who works closely with Peter knows how great he is.”

“Peter is a go-to person for any front end code questions.”

“Peter has a wealth of technical expertise... and helps elevate the team’s frontend standards.”

• I set a high standard of technical quality—across frontend and backend.
• I coach and mentor others, often informally, often across team lines.
• I raise the bar. Through documentation, through architecture, through process.
• I speak up when things don’t make sense. I challenge decisions that don’t serve the team or the product.
• I step in when others don’t. I fix what’s broken. I carry what needs to be carried.

Even in years where I felt lost, stuck, or undervalued, others saw impact. In fact, the moments I thought were quiet or invisible—those were often the moments people noticed the most.

“Your care and conviction are clear, even when they come across too strongly.”

⚡ But There Was Always Friction

The very things that made me effective also created tension:

“You sometimes lean heavily into disagreement.”

“Peter could be more effective at expressing that disagreement.”

“While well-intentioned, his frustration sometimes impacts how his feedback is received.”

• I was told to speak up—but also told I spoke up too much.
• I challenged the status quo—but was called adversarial.
• I strived for alignment—but often felt out of sync with leadership.
• I sought purpose—not promotion—but still got the latter without the former.

There’s a pattern of me stepping up, filling gaps, pushing for better—and then getting worn out because the system didn’t shift to support the weight I was carrying.

Especially when I moved into management. I helped transform a struggling team. I brought order to chaos. But I was also buried in administrative noise, redundant meetings, and decisions I couldn’t influence.

“Peter was one of the strongest voices advocating for long-term system health.”

“It’s clear Peter puts the team first, even at his own expense.”

And yet—even after returning to an IC role, I never stopped leading.

🔁 The Common Thread

From 2017 to 2024, through six managers, multiple reorgs, two career tracks, and countless deliverables—the consistent theme is this:

I care.

“Peter cares deeply about improving people, processes, and outcomes.”

“He constantly pushes us to raise the bar.”

I care about the product.
I care about the team.
I care about the user.
I care about how we work and whether we’re doing it well.

Sometimes that care looks like code.
Sometimes it looks like a challenging question.
Sometimes it looks like quietly fixing what others ignore.
And sometimes it looks like burnout.

🌱 What This Reflection Gave Me

I didn’t get a performance summary.
I got a mirror.

“You’re not broken—you’re just tired.”

It reminded me that I’m not lost—I’m in transition.
I’m not drifting—I’m navigating.
And I’m not broken—I’m just tired.

I’m proud of the systems I’ve improved.
I’m proud of the people I’ve helped.
I’m proud of the standards I’ve upheld even when it was hard.
I want to keep doing work that matters. But I also want to do it without sacrificing myself.

If you’re feeling stuck or burned out, I highly recommend pulling all your feedback together and asking someone—or something—to help you make sense of it. You might find strength you forgot about. You might find patterns worth breaking.

You might even find yourself again.

I did.